The Especially Kind Rejection

"Hello Krystal

Thank you for submitting your work to the ____ exhibition at ____ University. Unfortunately, your work was not selected for the exhibition.

We wish you well in your artistic endeavors and encourage you to apply again next year.

Thank you for introducing us to your work.

Sincerely,

________

Director, Art Gallery

_______ University"

I have to admit, out of all of the rejection letters I have recieved, this one was the most enjoyable.  It has a polite and kind tone to it...and at least it is addressed to me. 

Yes, I have recieved rejection letters for other people, but with my name on the envelope.  I was puzzled if I should find a way of contacting them to let them know the bad news and revel in our rejection together.  teehee  Is there an ethical way to go about that or some code of conduct?

"Hello, is this Sally Jo Bob?  This is Krystal Booth and I'm calling to let you know that you have been rejected by the such and such gallery for an exhibition.  I was too.  You may or may not know that already depending upon the letter you recieved.  Shall we meet for ice cream?"

The Artist's Way: Chapter Ten and Self-Protection

Self- protection was the topic of this week in more than just the chapter.  Synchronicity, ain't it a bitch?  The chapter told and warned of pitfalls that are a detriment to the creative spirit- typical blocks, workaholism, creative droughts, fame and competition.  It guided through how to recognize them and work through them so that we may protect our creative flow.  I learned a lesson in self-protection this week that came externally involving being let go, fired, removed, rejected, relieved of my first book illustration gig that I have been working on and extremely excited about.

I could go into details.  I could use profanity to describe my shock and frustrations.  I could go into the psychology behind his actions of dropping this bomb on me, but I am not going to do that.  That would be an unprofessional foolish mistake and a waste of time and energy.  However, I will tell you about what I have learned as a result of distancing myself from it for a few days, and it definitely has to do with self-protection.

I failed to protect my time for my own fine art. I am referring to the two series I had started of drawings based on psychology tests and paintings dealing with miracles.  They sat there shoved off into the corners of my work area for one and a half months.  I had this guilt that if I worked on them that I would be wasting time that could be spent working on illustrations.  On the other hand, I felt guilty that I had not worked on them at all.  Damned if you do, damned if you don't.  I did manage to finish a ceramic disected frog that I had for a collaborative project with Amanda Knauer, and believe me- I did feel some guilt for that as I was not working on the illustrations for the duration of what added up to be about a week when put together.  I would argue with myself that I should not feel guilty, but despite that, the guilt remained until I could go back to experimenting and layering the washes for the illustrations.

As I look back, all I can say is "What the F was I thinking?"  How could I let my time be manipulated like that with all of those guilty feelings?  It was adding up to be some heavy baggage in some ways.  Ultimately, I do not mourn the loss of the opportunity, but instead the loss of time for my own stories of paint.  Next time I will keep this in mind if there is a next time.  I'm not sure that I'm that interested in going through that again.  The continual feeling of having to prove your own abilities to someone who doesn't seem to trust you anyway (there were subtle signs though I tried to ignore them in order to stay postive for the project's protection), paired up with the guilty feeling of ignoring your own creative needs is not exactly the optimal life choice for anyone. 

So now I have moved back to my own work and I am feeling great in the freedom I feel once again.  I learned a lot about my own weaknesses of self-protection throughout this experience, and I am hoping that I will not have to relearn that lesson again.  So, look for new works to be posted soon on this blog and on my website at http://www.krystalbooth.com/. 

As far as the chapter went, I believe that I will be revisiting this one often.  I especially loved the sections about fame and competition as I felt as if I needed a bit of talking to about these topics.  I also feel that if you only read one chapter out of the entire book that I have read so far, it is Chapter Ten.  It really touched upon a lot of valuable things for any creative soul to think about. 

Onward to Chapter Eleven!

A Dose of Inspiration

"Let the critics spot trends.


Let reviewers concern themselves with
what is in and what is not.


Let us concern ourselves first and foremost
with what it is within us that is
struggling to be born."


- Julia Cameron, The Artist's Way

I guess this is the dose of inspiration that I needed upon receiving yet another show rejection.  It was for a group show called "Small Works" at Harper's College.  I really thought I stood a shot, but when the results were posted this morning, my name was clearly not there...I ran over the list three times checking for my name.  No Dice.

Oh well, I guess I'm just one rejection closer to a "Yes!", and that's some good news!  Get these rejections out of the way early.  I'd rather start slow and end brilliantly.  I want to be a comet invading the atmosphere- gaining speed, rather than fading further away.

The point is this- do the rejections in life hold all the weight of our decisions?  Do we let obstacles bully us into taking the easy path?  No, we don't.  We are who we are for a reason.  We do what we do because it is simply what we must do- to be more of ourselves and fulfill our duties in this life.  We rarely know why.  We only know about the driving forces within all of us and it is our choice to listen to it or not.  We have the responsibility of becoming more of ourselves everyday- this is a simple idea, though it is not always easy to do.  I'm still trying to get off of my training wheels, but it certainly helps when I see others off of theirs and being true to themselves despite the judgements of others.

This is not unlike when I actually did get my training wheels off of my bike- thank you Amy Grandin for the extra push I needed!  Without your inspiration, I do believe it would have taken years for me to have the courage I needed to shed those squeaky things!