Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The Big Snore and An Honest Portrayal


It seems it is time to redo my artist biography.  I started working on it this morning and am going to get it revised fully by tonight - at least that is the goal.  In general, bios are meant to be boring.  They are simply a paragraph form of a resume, and we all know how mindfully invigorating resumes are to read. 

Pure delight.

None the less, biographies do not have to boring according to some of the sources I've read, including the book "I'd Rather Be in the Studio" by Alyson B. Stanfield.  Some of the ways of adding interest seem cheesy though.  For example - "If you do not suffer from indigestion or rapid-oh-my-I-need-a-loo digestion after spicy food, there is a great Mexican restaurant around the corner from Clifford's work at the MOMA," or "If you are not afraid of getting shot or mugged, check out Gallery 3467 in the seedy part of the city which holds a work by Glenda in the main gallery."

Okay, so maybe I exaggerate on the ridiculousness, but it seems that writing a bio can be a fine balancing act.  No one wants to come off as a bore and likewise no one wants to come off as a hokey gimmick either.

To put it simply, the one I have now makes me cringe to place as an introduction for an online audience.  It would be okay for galleries, but even then it would be mediocre at best.  I will be taking a bit of advice from Ms. Stanfield in this endeavor to try it out...maybe not so drastically honest as the following:

"Krystal Booth is an artist that needs more practice and so she is trying different things out constantly.  If you like a work by her, you will be lucky if she creates another one like it.  This works well for people who do not enjoy a work created by her, as she is an artistic charmeleon and may possibly create something they like in the future.

She enjoyed earning her BFA and BA at Indiana University Purdue University Fort Wayne, but regrets not being smart enough to ask the right questions while there, and has had to research ever since.  Krystal was so naive at times that it causes her to cringe at some of her memories.  She rarely missed dollar pint nights at Munchie's on Mondays by the time she was a Junior, and enjoyed her fair share of Scooby Snacks there- fries with old bay seasoning and cucumber dip.  It caused her to be quite "volumptuous" at best.  She also learned that she is not skilled with 3-D Media as her metal-smithing projects always fell apart and her ceramics were unanimously agreed to be of the ugliest designs ever witnessed before and after firing.  Luckily, she was amused by her lack of skill.

She was born in Coldwater, Michigan and grew up in the cozy small town of Angola, Indiana.  She lived in Florida and New York chasing other dreams in order to avoid being an artist - she thought being an artist was only for a select few.  In New York she "grew a pair" (she emphatically hates this saying) and finally decided to go for it by enrolling in college for art back in Fort Wayne.  She now lives in beautiful Portland, Oregon with her fun and wonderful fiance and two cats.  She dreams of having a funding sponsor for her art someday and feels this sponsorship has been well-earned with Maruchan Instant Lunch and/or Nissin Cup of Noodles."

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